WITCHING and BITCHING: Jesus with a Shotgun!

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Who would have thought 2013 would be the year of “Jesus with a Shotgun?” First, SNL spoofs “Django Unchained” with “DJesus Unchained” and now we have a Spanish horror movie portraying the “Prince of Peace” as a shotgun yielding killer.  The next one will probably have Jesus in a Kevlar vest driving an armored vehicle with a 50 caliber machine gun. There seems to be a fascination on spoofing Jesus.

Again notice how these Spanish movie producers, writers, and directors will not spoof Mohammed. Because they know the Muslims would burn Spain to the ground! It seems perfectly fine to lambaste the King of Kings. I hate to say this but there is something to be said of public beheadings. It certainly causes one to pause before lambasting (through art) Spiritual figureheads, let alone the “Son of God.” Especially if you are the one at the receiving end of a beheading; but, hey Christians do not get down like this! Hence, the new trend in equipping Jesus with a shotgun!


The official trailer for Witching and Bitching

I for one enjoy international movies and do not mind reading sub-titles to enjoy them. This movie cultivates the legends of witches from the days of yore. I do enjoy getting a glimpse into the perspectives of the witching culture and how it could be potentially going strong today. The big difference is witches do not have to be hideous. You could be working with a witch, sleeping with a witch, or living next to one.

These movies about witches certainly exaggerate the image of witches and set the expectation for a witch encounter. Allegedly, there are several known celebrities who practice Wicca like Patrick Stewart, Avril Lavigne, Fairuza Balk, Gabriel Byrne, and Vigo Mortensen.  Here is a brief insight into the Wicca religion.

Wicca is unrelated to Satanism. It is a group of religious traditions. Some are highly structured, while most are eclectic. Many, perhaps most, Wiccans are solitary practitioners. Wiccans are, in many ways, directly opposite to Satanists:

Most Wiccans worship a Goddess and her consort, a God.

  • They do not recognize Satan or any other all-evil supernatural entity.
  • Their prime symbol is the exact opposite to the symbol used by Satanists. It is the upright pentagram — a 5-pointed star with two points downward and one up. Sometimes it is enclosed by a circle to form a pentacle.
  • Their groups are generally called covens, not grottos or temples.
  • Their rule of behavior is called the Wiccan Rede: “An it harm none, do what thou wilt.” i.e. do whatever you wish, as long as it harms no one, including yourself. Wiccans are not allowed do dominate, manipulate, control, or harm others.

As you can see Wiccans do not acknowledge Jesus or The Most High. They worship a Goddess which could be related to Lilith. As the story goes, Lilith being Adam’s first wife seem to relate to the Sumero-Babylonian Goddess Belit-ili, or Belili. To the Canaanites, Lilith was Baalat, the “Divine Lady.” On a tablet from Ur, ca. 2000 BCE, she was addressed as Lillake.

Acts 8:9-11 (NIV) Now for some time a man named Simon had practiced sorcery in the city and amazed all the people of Samaria. He boasted that he was someone great, and all the people, both high and low, gave him their attention and exclaimed, “This man is the divine power known as the Great Power.” They followed him because he had amazed them for a long time with his magic.

It is also said Lilith cheated on Adam with Satan himself and spawned the demon race on Earth today. Perhaps this is the origin of the phrase “African Trouser Snake?” Whatever the case you can see Wicca is diametrically opposed to the teachings of The Christ and the Bible is opposed to witchcraft. So these above-mentioned celebrities are in fact antichrist.

In closing, as you will see in this movie, witchcraft has rich and cultural history which can be traced back to ancient times. In essence, nothing has really changed but the backdrop, clothing, and hairstyles. Obviously, we are in different times but the ancient spells have been recorded and have matriculated into different practices. Some call it Wicca and some call it Satanism; but, at the end of the day it is all antichrist.


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Michael Erevna is a writer, inventor, solutions architect and independent researcher
of: ancient civilizations, spirituality, mysticism, and Biblical teachings.

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  • Matt Stone

    From what I saw their portrayal of witchcraft is just as inaccurate as their portrayal of Jesus.